avoid

I decided a few days ago it was about time to test my dried poppy latex. I thought of having a a strong analgesic/anaesthetic in the event of being the subject of intense pain, so I wondered if pills made of the dried juice of some exotic poppies may be an effective option.

About half four yesterday afternoon I took some 2 grammes of dried latex comprised of six small balls about 4.5mm in diameter. The pills were at least a couple years old and hard and dry; I washed them down a cup of juice. It took some hour before I was sure I felt different however some 18 hours later and I am still not operating as usual for me.

The first thing I noticed was that it was easier to relax, almost like I didn't have to try, although I had felt it was a good space to be in. As there is an expectation that I would relax I have no idea of the effectiveness as this point.

The next notable matter was loosing co-ordination similar to alcohol, however this was accompanied by an intellectual clarity.

But by far the most notable properties was feeling a slight butterflies in the stomach increasingly becoming a feeling of sickness. I had already decided I wouldn't like to eat but I also found drinking disturbing. Since I have drunk maybe 100ml in small mouthfuls and only just now did I keep a quarter of cup of lemon tainted water down around 11am and now I feel like vomiting.

One other notable thing is that I can't swallow easily or fart. It seems the 'opiates' ... oops! I have to throw up .... multiple times, god knows where the fluid came from: and on that note, no doubt some of the dizziness is due to lack of fluid and sugar,.

I have moments of warmth, though not too flushed, and short spells of shivering with a cold feeling when out in the fresh air. Still now I have thrown up I feel better.

Given the paralysing effects of the opiates it's little wonder I cannot co-ordinate my limbs and that the peristaltic motion in the alimentary canal is curtailed. No doubt the pills don't pass through the stomach however the small amount of liquid swallowed, with the associated vomiting does at least remove some of the matter, which could well be most of that consumed.

At this point It is clear that I may have taken too much; the mental benefits are not an inducement to take more and the physical discomfort dissuades me from trying again. I have troubles seeing as focusing muscles are slow, which indicate a general lack of involuntary muscle control. which in theory it could affect the heart. :)

Just had one of my many half an hour breaks as I cannot focus for long, the last vomit got rid a bit more embedded bits.

Well the day is moving on and brightening, but not much chance to doing anything physical x x x

12:26 Have to lay down repeatedly to stop feeling sick almost any movement brings sickness on, but once I've had a rest I feel positively well, yes not just ok. I feel lighter, more relaxed, happy and . . .

14:40 Feeling a bit more as usual, though I feel a bit sick after a drink I haven't thrown up, which is good as I haven't had a pee for ages.

18:00 Well after a full cup of sweet rooibos tea, some hour later I have thrown up, and it appears more came out than went in. This is a pity as I am still not flushing my kidneys.

There's also the question of the contents of the vomit, still very dark with bits which reminds of the term coffee grounds used for blood in the stomach, although I am pretty sure this is not the case here.

Still I'm feeling ok and have done some physical work, which may have brought on the vomiting???

I managed to eat some oats, raisins and strawberries this evening.

Monday 25th More oats and strawberries this morning: all good